He's Mine Tonight

He's mine tonight. No matter how many pills he takes he can't sleep. TV on, desperately trying to avoid re-runs of Holby City and Casuality he hops around the news channels; BBC, Sky, Fox and CNN. I whisper to him 'stop being a snob and watch Kyle.' I tell him it's okay, the house is empty and if he keeps the volume down no-one needs to know. But no, he has to stick with the news instead; Mandela, floods, student protests, economic growth forecasts(very boring)To be honest, I think he is searching for an antidote or a pacifier, something that says 'there are people all over the world a lot worse off than me.' Awful, grow up Karl, ditch the liberal humanitarian shit, your are dealing with one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse my son; tumour = death. Get it? He get's it but having failed to block me out he starts on a different tack. I must admit I expected him to get to this point a lot earlier. Yes here we go, the idiotic grin, fingers drumming on the kitchen table. Note: The way in which he's thinking would spoil everything. I try to mess with the electricity in his brain but a seizure is not forthcoming. He's resisting, thinking major distractions and spoilers - heroin, cocaine, whores, alcohol - oh he thinks he could forget about me but knows there's only one way to forget about me and he aint got the bottle to destroy Jack like that. So we settle down in the dark together and tune into the Mandela channel...bad news, our Karl's getting off on this...peace, humility and bravery...that's a sickly mix...but he drinks it down...and I puff myself up...come on sick it up...but he keeps it down...peace and the humility that's real healthy meal.